Another frosty Monday but today I am prepared. I’ve WD40’d the locks on the Mules, as Richard suggested. I’ve got my winter trousers back on (this time not requiring the assistance of a man who can bench-press 140lbs) and I’ve got the car key in my pocket so I can move it out of the way (it has to go. If anyone wants to buy a 4-year old Vauxhall Agila, please contact Highwaylass Quality Motors at the usual address).
But there is a new hurdle in my way – the ignition lock has frozen solid this time.
Small light bulb moment.
Back into the house, warm up the key on the gas hob. Try not to ignite the plastic at the top of the key. Put box of matches in pocket in case exercise needs repeating.
Lock the door, try not to burn self on key, rush round to bike before key gets cold, stick key in lock.
Lock frees up, bike starts.
Fret about whether I turned the gas off. Decide that if I do burn the house down it will save on hoovering.
Escape onto the road, wondering again why it is that I ride a bike.
Oh, that’s right – because it’s less stressful.