Preparations for Australia #4

I am a feminist. I disapprove of the time and effort modern culture requires to be expended in depilation to make adult women resemble Thai ladyboys. However, I am also vain. Being 6 ft tall and fond of comfortable shoes, I fear that arriving in a Hot Nation with furry thighs and a swimsuit will leave no doubt as to which end of the Oval I bowl from. So I have invested in the instrument of torture known as the Epilator. The last two hours have revealed two useful facts. The first is that pain isn’t what it used to be. The first time I tried one of these I had to give up after 20 minutes and take it back to the shop. All that falling on my head has at least been good for something. The second is that I have a *lot* of scars on my legs. I’m really bad at shaving. Thank god dowager beard-dom remains some years away. The third is that “perfect results in minutes” is either a lie or is based on a test subject with significantly shorter legs than me.

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6 Comments

Filed under Australia

6 responses to “Preparations for Australia #4

  1. Bitumen! can't beat it, It's gotta be far better than wax for hair removal and -as you'll have burnt all of your skin off putting it on anyway- you won't have to do it again. Result!!

  2. Why suffer pain? Use my nifty electric Philips beard trimmer with self sharpening blades. I have reasons to believe that it works at all ends of the pitch.

  3. the downside of shaving is a stubbly infield….

  4. I never was a much of a cricketer…

  5. If it's any consolation my wife and daughter say it gets less painful the more you practice, something to do with the hairs getting finer as you pull them out rather than cut them back, don't use one myself;-)

  6. Must say this bear prefers hair!

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